Self-isolation Improvisation

Well here we are, barely into 2020 (I mean, we only just turned the clocks forward, for crying out loud!) and we have a pandemic to deal with. Just lovely.

In order to 'flatten the curve' on the progress of the Covid-19 virus, the powers that be are encouraging those of us who can, who are not essential or emergency workers, to 'self-isolate'. We introverts call this 'a regular day'.

While we're holed up waiting for the all-clear, seems like lots of folks are dusting off the to-do lists. Closets are getting cleaned (along with everything else). Gardens are getting tended. And at our house, old recipes are getting culled.

In fact, I foresee home cooking making a powerful comeback after this virus thing winds down. Even for people like me, who aren't exactly in love with spending time in the kitchen. When your favorite restaurants have shut down, and you're too spooked by watching Contagion and Outbreak to hit up the curbside or drive-through, your only option is cooking for yourself.

I should clarify that I use the term 'cooking' lightly. It's more of an assembly project. Throw a bunch of stuff together, maybe heat it; call it a day.

So i thought I would share this recipe with you in case you are also looking for something easy and relatively healthy to feed the hordes while you're cooped up together.

Notice I've improvised many of the instructions in this recipe because either I didn't have them on hand (hello, Covid Panic Shoppers), or I just don't like them and don't want them in my salad.

Cheddar Broccoli Salad

6 cups fresh broccoli florets
*IDK about 6 cups. I just had about one and a half crowns on hand and snipped off the good bits on the top. I kept the stems, though. They're good for other stuff like soups.

1-1/2 cups (6 oz.) shredded cheddar cheese
*I love me some cheese, don't get me wrong. But for some reason today I just wasn't feelin' the cheese in this salad. I grated a carrot instead. Looks like grated cheese, but way fewer calories. Don't worry, we'll have plenty of naughty calories in the dressing.

1/3 cup chopped onion
*I didn't measure the onion. I just eyeballed it and cut a little chunk off a red onion, Any kind of onion is fine. I happened to have an overabundance of red onion on hand because last time I was HEB, they only had 3 lb. bags on offer and I couldn't buy any individually, like I usually do. So for a while, we will have red onion in everything we eat.

12 bacon strips, cooked and crumbled
*I skipped the bacon. We had some already cooked , thanks to my hubs who likes to grill up a bunch of man meat every now and then, and did so recently, even though he got interrupted when he ran out of propane and we had to wait until a trip to Lowe's (while practicing our newly developed Social Distancing skills) before he could finish cooking. But I have cut waaaaay back on eating pork after watching (and ugly crying at the end of) Okja. So, no bacon for me. But if you want some, go ahead!

Not called for in the original recipe, but I threw some in anyway:
1 pint cherry tomatoes, each cut in half lengthwise (they were about to go bad)
A few chunks of raw cauliflower (they were about to go bad)

The Dressing

And here's where we get to the naughty part.

1-1/2 cups mayo
*We don't usually eat a lot of mayo, but lately I have had some on hand because I went through a self-proscribed deviled egg challenge a few months back. I was determined to learn how to make them properly. I love eating them and can make a pretty good filling, but the peeling of the eggs part was just a nightmare. More on that some other time. So I had plenty of mayo, but 1-1/2 cups? Yikes, that's a lot. Then I remembered I had a little leftover Ranch dip that I made using a packet of their dry dressing mix and some plain Greek yogurt. It was really good btw - highly recommend making your own! So I used the rest of that, which was about a half cup. I filled out this mayo requirement with another half cup of plain Greek yogurt, and the final half cup of mayo.

3/4 cup sugar
*Excuse me? 3/4 cup? I don't think so! Makes my teeth ache just thinking about it. Must be a typo. I used 1/4 cup instead.

3 tablespoons red wine or cider vinegar
*Little known fact: 3 TBSP = 1/4 cup. I had a little apple cider vinegar on hand, but I use than in my smoothies and am about out and chose to hoard that for now. I did have a nearly empty bottle of rice vinegar, so I used that instead. I didn't measure, but it was probably about 1/4 cup. I don't think it matters much what kind of vinegar you use here. Maybe not balsamic, unless you substitute some feta for the cheddar . . .

That's it for the dressing. Just whisk together those three ingredients (mayo, sugar, vinegar).

The dressing recipe makes A LOT of dressing. I only used about half the dressing and it was more than enough to saturate the vegetables. Food porn note: that picture of this salad up there at the beginning of this post was clearly taken BEFORE they added the dressing. The dressing is a milky white and your salad will not look like that picture after you add it. It's not ugly or unappetizing, just different. Kinda like poppyseed dressing.

I did have a test taste of the dressing since I had made so many changes to it. It was AWESOME, if I don't say so myself. I will be keeping my improvised dressing recipe handy to use on other things.

The original recipe's assembly instructions are pretty simple: combine the veggies in a large bowl. Make the dressing; toss to coat. Refrigerate for at least 4 hours. If you are using the bacon, add it just before serving. Makes 8 servings.

My best to all during these troubling Covid-19 times. Here's to staying healthy and making the best of a bad situation - and of whatever random stuff is in the fridge/pantry. Stay well!

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