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I'm sitting here in March enjoying a string of delightfully warm spring days before

A handy little app

the heat and humidity of summer smacks us cross-eyed. Despite the fabulous weather, I'm feeling a little peeved today. One of my writing goals is to try out listening to podcasts as a means of absorbing knowledge about the craft. I have the podcast app on my phone. Now when I go for my walk, instead of the same 14 songs in the rotation on Pandora, I listen to podcasts. Multitasking!

In the process of learning how best to fit podcasts into my schedule, I've subscribed to a dozen or so of them. I found them either in online articles or a simple search in iTunes. As a result, I have a couple that I really like; one or two more that I'll listen to if I'm all caught up on my favorites; and a few others that are not making the grade.

One of my favorites is Joanna Penn's The Creative Penn. She's been doing regular podcasts since 2008, and it shows. She's an experienced and successful self-published author. Her voice is pleasant. Her topics and guests are interesting. Her interviews are professional and entertaining. The paid promotions are brief. The show notes are thorough and easy to track down if I want more information on something mentioned during the show. This show is the gold standard for writing-related podcasts IMO. I also am a faithful follower of The Story Grid philosophy of story structure and editing. It has a pretty good concept: an experienced editor is paired with a newbie author and guides him through the writing and editing process for one of his books in real time.

On the other end of the scale, let me describe in very generously anonymous detail why I'm writing this post today. I believe there was some study that said podcasts were the up and coming thing. So everybody with a microphone and two working vocal chords is jumping on the bandwagon. It's similar to the growth of the self-publishing industry, I suppose. People hear of a possible shortcut to making some quick cash and figure, why not? The result also is similar - very uneven quality. You have to kiss a lot of frogs, as they say. If you're thinking of joining the podcast revolution, go right ahead. But please avoid annoying people like me who have social media accounts and (sort of) know how to use them.

How To Avoid Feeling Like I'm Writing This Post About Your Podcast

  • The #1 thing is prepare-prepare-prepare. As you can probably tell from the Get Off My Lawn tone of this post, I'm of a certain generation. Terry Gross's Fresh Air is the best audio interview program that ever was or ever will be. No one out-prepares Terry Gross. Great topics. Great conversations. Great editors. It's obvious that she reads her guests' books and watches their TV shows and movies and probably eats the same food and drives the same car and uses the same deodorant as her guests, for all I know. I am astonished at how prepared she is. I mean, there are only 24 hours in a day. She must have learned how to manipulate time from one of her guests. It helps to have lots of underlings, I suppose. And of course a professional studio. Speaking of which . . .
  • Quality equipment - none of us are super pumped about listening to your voice echo off the bare walls and hard metal surfaces of your laundry room for an hour. I'm not saying you have to invest thousands in studio time or construction. I found out by accident that closets are a decent place to record if you have no other options. The clothes make for excellent sound absorption. All I'm saying is, give it some thought and actually listen to some test recordings of yourself before you go live.

Anyway - here's what happens when you slack off on the preparation. All of the following are actual situations I have heard during a podcast. I am not making this up.

  • You freely admit to your author guest that you didn't plan properly and weren't able to finish their book before the show. Or in fact have not read any of it at all. All you know about it is whatever showed up on the screen shot from their Amazon page.
  • You freely admit, on air with them, that you have no idea how to pronounce their name. Which is perfectly fine, because you doubt you'll even remember their name by tomorrow. Yes, the host actually said this second sentence to the guest during the show. WTF? Apparently it's too much trouble to connect with the guest ninety seconds before air time if you're not 100% sure how to pronounce their name.
  • You freely admit that you have little knowledge of, or interest in, their genre. Your tone indicates no apology or remorse. In fact, you seem to think this is a positive in that there must be millions more people out there who have little interest in this niche and
    Don't be the Cousin Eddie of podcasters

    therefore are all potential new readers. Okay, maybe. But if it were me, as host, I don't think I'd mention. There are plenty of ways to have a meaningful conversation with someone on a topic you're not familiar with other than keep circling back to the point that you're not familiar with the topic. Maybe you think it makes you look curious and adventuresome. It might, if you were browsing the bookstore looking for a good weekend read. But as a podcast host, it just makes you look lazy and unprepared.

  • You freely admit you have no idea what the guest's website is. This is no problem, you say, because it'll be in the show notes. See if you can guess how confident I am in your ability to cobble together a quality set of show notes.
  • You have the same set of ten or so lackluster questions that you ask every guest, more or less in the same order. You never stray from this set of questions, even when intriguing conversational opportunities present themselves. This strategy has been known to work in print media (as long as the questions aren't lackluster). It may also be a good guide for audio interviews, so that you don't get too excited during the interview and overlook any important questions. But a well-prepared host needs to be aware of - heck, needs to be praying for - opportunities to explore a compelling line of questioning. Just reading off a list of questions, waiting for the answer, and moving to the next question is a bore.
  • It comes up partway through the interview that the guest had a book promotion that ended two days before the interview was to air. Oh well, says the host, it's a good thing for you we just barely missed your promotion deadline, because now everyone will have to pay more for your book. WTF??
  • You craft a title for your episode for the best possible SEO and social media click bait. It works beautifully, and many listeners tune in. And are subsequently frustrated by having to listen to 47 minutes of blather before getting to the 2:38 of content that actually relates to the topic you advertised. And will unsubscribe from your podcast before you've finished your closing comments. And wish they had that 49:38 minutes of their life back.
  • You ask your guest for ideas on other guests they think your listeners might enjoy, or other podcasts you could guest on to promote your podcast. You ask this during their interview, not privately before or after. Rude much?

I already feel guilty enough about carping on these podcast upstarts, so I'm not gonna name names here. The good ones are worthwhile, especially if you have some time to kill during a daily walk or commute. I've gotten some great info listening to The Creative Penn and a few others. But I'm not Terry Gross. I don't have a magical 5 extra hours in every solar day. So I'm pulling the plug on the the Cousin Eddies. Maybe I'll check back with them in a few years when they're better prepared.

What are some of your favorite podcasts? Drop them in the comments. I'm always looking for a new listen.

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2

The midway at the 1904 World's Fair, known as The Pike. And yes, that's where the expression 'coming down the pike' originates. Photo found at CrawfordDirect.com via Google.

I was doing some research about the 1904 World's Fair recently, which got me to wondering: whatever happened to the World's Fairs? All kinds of cool things went on at the 1904 Worlds Fair in St. Louis, the coolest of which perhaps was the introduction of ice cream served in cones. Thanks to Syrian immigrant Ernest Hamwi, we can enjoy the sweet creaminess without lapping it out of a bowl like my yellow Lab used to do. Two other personal favorites made an appearance there. Hamburgers were introduced to the world by a fellow known as Uncle Fletch, the owner of a small cafe in Athens, Texas. Now it all makes sense why, as a Native Texan, I can't quit my cheeseburger habit. Curse you, Whataburger! Oh - and the other thing going on at the fair (as if ice cream and hamburgers weren't enough): just a little something we like to call the Olympics. According to Wiki, this was the first Olympics held in a predominantly English-speaking country, as well as the first held outside of Europe. I'm guessing the event planner profession also made its debut here.


Admission to the 1904 World's Fair cost fifty cents for adults and a nickel for kids. In 2016 money that works out to around $12.50 for an adult and around a buck and a quarter for kids.

World's Fairs began, as all cool things do, in France. The first one was held in 1844. The idea was to showcase interesting, innovative products and inventions and entertainment and activities from a variety of countries. It's as if South by

But where is the flashlight app??

Southwest and the Consumer Electronics Show had an international baby. The fairs earned a reputation for introducing incredible technological advances to the world, such as the telephone, the electrical outlet (making electricity easily available to the general public), the diesel engine, the x-ray machine, and touch screen technology.

The fairs have been held in a variety of locations, which makes sense, considering its billing as an international event. U.S. cities have hosted them a dozen or more times since the first one in Philadelphia in 1876. The fairs are similar to the Olympics in that they are organized by a governing body; countries bid to have them; they are held to a certain schedule (every five years since 1995); and cost a bundle to put on. Unlike the Olympics, World's Fairs tend to linger from weeks to months, presumably to bring in as much attendance as possible and try to make their money back.

Spend an afternoon researching fairs and they will all start to run together. But a few stand out in my mind:

  • 1893 Chicago - loads of innovative stuff debuted here, including the world's first Ferris wheel. But they will forever be eclipsed in my mind because the fair was the inspiration for Eric Larsen's terrifyingly non-fiction Devil in the White City, about a serial killer who ran amok at the same time the fair was going on.
  • 1962 Seattle - I didn't realize the iconic Space Needle was a holdover from a
    The observation towers and pavilion of the 1964 New York City World's Fair in their heyday

    World's Fair. I feel like I should've known that. I've never visited Seattle. It's on the bucket list.

  • 1964 New York City - speaking of architecture, the observation towers made famous in the original Men In Black movie are not faring too well and are considered 'ruins'. But the Unisphere still stands. I saw it when were attending the U. S. Open a few years ago.

The last fair in the U.S. was held in New Orleans in 1984, and none are scheduled here through 2020. I guess we'll just have to be satisfied with CES and SXSW.

This post originally appeared in the 2016 A to Z Blog Challenge.

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Working on the SS George Washington Carver in a shipyard in California

Ask around wherever you live, and I'll bet you'll find more folks 'not from around here' than locals. And I'll also bet the reason they're Here rather than There is simple: Jobs.

Humans have been migrating to improve their prospects since Ice Age hunters crossed the Bering Strait. When I was researching my latest book, I studied immigration patterns of Norwegians to America. It's mind-boggling how many people risked everything for a chance to provide a better situation for themselves and their family. They may not have looked at it as moving for a job opportunity, but that's basically what they were doing.

Migration (as opposed to immigration) patterns are slightly different in that they occur within a country's borders. Just because you don't feel the need to change countries doesn't mean you won't be packing a bag to follow a job. Ask anyone in the armed services. Or at FedEx, which is how our family came to live in seven different cities (and six states) in eighteen years. These migration patterns are equally fascinating to me, perhaps because I have a personal connection.

The T6-Texan Trainer manufactured by the North American plant in the Dallas area

One of my favorite family tales involves the World War II era. My dad and his brother were born in a small rural town east of Dallas, Texas. They came from a long line of farmers, since those first Norwegian ancestors came to Texas in the 1850s. But the times, they were a-changin'. During the war, manufacturing boomed. Strict immigration laws enacted in the 1920s shut off the supply of foreign labor. Factories couldn't find workers fast enough. When war came and stimulated the manufacturing sector, many jobs were available for workers already living in America, regardless of race or gender.  The American work force increased dramatically as rural workers and women joined the ranks.

My paternal grandfather was among the first group. He went to work at the 'bomber plant', aka North American, later known as Ling Tempco Vought or LTV, in the Dallas area. Housing was scarce in the city. At first, he went alone and came home on the weekends. Eventually a room in town became available. Not a house. A room. So my grandmother was able to join him. There was only one problem. They had two sons, and the landlord would only allow one more person to occupy the lease. The decision was made: my dad's younger brother was to go to the big city with his folks. My dad would be left behind with his grandparents on the family farm. (Cue the sad violin music here.) As my dad was telling me this story, I tried to be brave, but I fear I may have experienced some eye sweat. I told him I thought this was one of the saddest things I ever heard. He said, "Why? I loved the farm. It was my home. My granddad spoiled me rotten. I was sad when I eventually had to move to the city with my folks." Shows what I know.

I grew up vaguely aware that my paternal grandfather worked in the war effort. It was only recently as my mom was telling me some of her family lore that I learned her father also came from their farm in rural Texas to work at the bomber plant. The same plant. (You may be wondering: did everyone work at this plant? Actually, yes.) In both cases, the families ended up relocating to Dallas permanently, leaving farm life behind. And if not for this, my parents likely never would have met, and that would have been exceedingly bad luck for me.

The green indicates increase in population; the purple, decrease. Map from census.gov.

My grandfathers didn't have far to migrate for their defense industry jobs, but many others did. Around four million people migrated to a war-related job in the World War II era and afterward. They often moved long distances, even cross-country. There wasn't a bomber plant or shipyard on every corner. They tended to be in northern cities or on the West Coast.

Migration was a societal force within the African American community in particular. They made up about a third of the migration figures quoted above. In 1940, an estimate 45% of African Americans worked on farms. By 1980, that number had shrunk to 1%. Many saw the war industry as an opportunity to escape lower status jobs as well as the Jim Crow segregation laws that dominated areas of the South at that time.

The tides turned again later in the 20th century when lower cost of living, fewer labor unions, and better weather enticed many companies to relocate their operations back into the South. I never met a Yankee or ate a bagel until some time in the 1980s. Now, they're everywhere (including in my house - my husband is from Philadelphia).

I'm very curious to see what the next job migration wave will be, if any. So many people work remotely these days. The next iteration may be greatly simplified. Instead of predicting which part of the country will see an influx of workers, it may just be a matter of determining which room in the house works best as a home office.

My current workplace

This originally appeared as part of the 2016 A to Z Blog Challenge. 

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2

This drawing is often associated with Hugh Glass. I have been unable to discover who drew it. Still, pretty cool. The bear claw necklace is an ironic touch.

Be still, my historian heart! Ever since I learned the movie The Revenant was based on the life of Hugh Glass, I've been beside myself with glee. Colorful characters like Glass are the reason I converted to full-on history nerd. I can't argue with those who say history is boring. It can be very tedious if one is bombarded with nothing but names and dates and memorization. But people love a good story, and history is full of good stories.

When I was getting my Masters in history back in the day, I focused on American history prior to 1900. Exploration of both the New World and the American West were my favorite topics. There was just something about the bravery and drive of individuals who were willing to forge ahead into unknown lands that captivated me. So when I heard about this movie, I dug out my old handwritten notes (transcribed while spending endless afternoons at the university library, which, thanks to some lingering pack rat tendencies, were still carefully preserved in a few yellowing folders). This method of acquiring knowledge is now laughably quaint. I can now find ten times the amount of information in one tenth the time thanks to Google.

Thanks to The Revenant film, there are many articles online about Mr. Glass and his amazing life. I'll give you the broad details and if you're interested in learning more, that's wonderful, and that's what Google is for. Much of what we know about Hugh Glass is from word of mouth from himself and others; hearsay, tall tales bordering on mythology. Who knows how much of this really happened? Mountain men not only lived adventurous lives; they were known for their propensity for spinning yarns, especially when regaling greenhorns like newspaper reporters and dime novelists. Indeed, at the annual trapper 'rendevous' - think Sturgis without the motorcycles - a liar's contest was featured, along with games, gambling, and drinking.

Mr. Glass is most well known for surviving being left for dead after a grizzly bear attack while on a scouting expedition in South Dakota in 1823. His will to survive (plus IMO his thirst for revenge on the two comrades who abandoned him to his fate) drove him to drag himself 100 miles back to the nearest outpost, Fort Kiowa. I don't know if this story line will appear in the movie, but prior to his frontier days, Glass was rumored to have escaped impressment into the crew of pirate Jean Lafitte by jumping ship and swimming two miles to the Texas coast.

Amazingly, Glass is hardly the lone example of mountain men for whom cheating death was part of the job description. I've put together a chart to summarize a few other mountain men to demonstrate the similarities. And by no means is this list conclusive. These nuts were as plentiful as acorns on an oak.

Mountain Man Survived Grizzly Attack Attacked by Indians Killed by Indians Returned to Civilization Died in bed Book Written About Movie Made About Historical Marker(s)
Hugh Glass 1785-1833 1823 1823, 1824 Arikaras, 1833 The Revenant (2015) Shadehill SD
John 'Liver-Eating' Johnson 1900 aka 'Crow Killer' too many to count Jeremiah Johnson (1972) Cody WY
John Colter 1744-1813 1809 (2), 1810 Stuart's Draft VA
Jim Bridger 1804-1881 Bridger MT
Kit Carson 1809-1868 1834 1833, 1838, 1843, 1846 Kit Carson (1940) many
Jedediah Smith 1799-1831 1823 1823, 1827, 1828 Comanches, 1831 many

Less well-known, but equally colorful:

  • Mike Fink, the Ndamukong Suh of mountain men. He reputedly bit off the nose of a fellow mountain man during a fight, and killed another during a drunken game of William Tell.
  • Jim Clyman, who became separated from his companions and survived a two month hike to Fort Atkinson by employing such survival skills as killing his dinner with leg bones scavenged from a wild horse skeleton.
  • "Old Bill" Williams, a former Methodist minister known for his eccentric ways (and to be thought eccentric by mountain men should tell you something about his personal habits). While setting beaver traps, he was beset by three Blackfoot Indians, who shot him twice with arrows and made off with his rifle, Old Fetchem. Guns being the frontier equivalent of gold bars, Old Bill was not satisfied to escape with his life. He meant to recover his rifle. He dug out the arrowheads, tracked the Blackfeet, and killed two of them as they slept off a big dinner of fresh buffalo. The third he scalped but allowed to escape so as to spread the word he was not a trapper to be trifled with.

You might be wondering why in the world anyone would want to embrace a lifestyle in which run-ins with grizzly bears and hostile natives was fairly common. Then, as now, it was partly due to opportunity. After Thomas Jefferson bought the Louisiana from France in 1803 and the Lewis and Clark expedition explored over 800,000 square miles of land and found it exceeded expectations, opportunists of every stripe headed west. These were the entrepreneurs of their era, unwilling or unable to fit into society's existing employment structure: craftsmen, teachers, farmers, the military. The requirements for having a go at the frontier life were simple. Can you hunt? Can you fight? You're hired. Many were also attracted to, in the words of author John Myers Myers, "the way of life in a region so remote from all fountainheads of law and decorum".  Wild West, indeed.

It's gratifying that at least one person other than me (the author of the book The Revenant is based on, for one) finds this stuff so interesting. All of these other characters deserve a book and a movie and a television series of their own. History nerds:  keep cranking out content! Maybe one day one of our names will appear in the credits of a film starring an impossibly handsome actor made impossibly grubby thanks to some makeup artist's fine skills. You'll have to wait until the final credits, but it'll be worth it to see: 'based on the book by [insert your name here]'.

Recommended reading:

Bravos of the West by John Myers Myers

A Life Wild and Perilous by Robert M. Utley

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The main character of my book The Dala Horse, is a 10-year-old girl growing up in a Norwegian immigrant settlement in post-Civil War Texas. Her parents were born in Norway, but she was born in Texas. The book is inspired by the early Norwegian immigrants to Texas, including my own ancestors.

The definitive proof . . .

People are usually surprised to learn there are Norwegians in Texas. While it’s true most Norwegian immigrants to America settled farther north, some intrepid souls did choose the Lone Star State.

Norwegian immigrants came to America in three major waves in the second half of the 19th century. But the earliest came during an economic downturn after the Napoleonic Wars 1807-1814.

Norway had outgrown its ability to provide enough food for its population. If you imagine Norway is a top hat, only the narrow brim is practical for farming due to the mountainous terrain. In the 1800s, only about 3% of its land was under cultivation, mainly due to Norway’s geography.

In addition, prosperous farmers who invested in commercial agriculture to take advantage of this imbalance lost out when domestic markets fell to cheap imports. Many went bankrupt.

Faced with a transition from an agricultural to a money economy, many found immigration more attractive than moving to cities. After all, exploration and adventure was in their Viking blood! Pair this with the generous land policies in Texas, and it's easy to see why so many were willing to risk the journey.

Immigration was also fueled by the 19th century version of social media: newspapers, magazines, and letters from friends who had already moved away and liked the result.

Early emigration proponents included

All three had tremendous influence on Norwegian immigration patterns. All spent their final years in Texas and are buried there.

Johan Reinert Reiersen

Of the three, Reiersen perhaps had the most impact bringing Norwegians to Texas. He visited the fledgling republic while touring America in the 1840s.  He traveled to Austin and met with Sam Houston.

Reiersen was favorably impressed by Houston’s offers of support for any immigrants choosing Texas as their new home. Reierson’s book, magazine, and newspaper articles influenced many to join him there.

He and a small group of settlers founded the first Norwegian community in Texas in 1845. Initially called Normandy, today it is known as Brownsboro.

(However, they were not the first Norwegian settlers in Texas. That would be Johannes Nordboe, who had settled near present day Dallas in 1838.)

Cheap land - and plenty of it! - undoubtedly was a major factor in convincing immigrants to move to Texas. After Texas became a state in 1845, a married couple could claim a 640 acre section (one square mile). At that time, the average farm in Norway was 2-20 acres.

Not 220.

Between TWO and TWENTY.

The process of staking a claim in Texas varied, but went something like this:

  • claim the land
  • establish a home and cultivate at least 10 acres
  • occupy at least 3 years
  • pay for survey

And the land was yours, for anywhere from free to $2/acre.

No wonder immigrating to Texas sounded like a pretty good deal! The land was plentiful and cheap, but that was only a small part of the cost to immigrate. Immigration was booming. The ship captains were no dummies, and fares were at a premium.

As an example, immigrant one immigrant's fare on the ship New England from France to New Orleans was about $950. The fare on the riverboat St. Helena was $75 from New Orleans to Shreveport.

And this does not include her voyage from Norway to France. Or traveling overland from New Orleans to her final destination in Texas. One inflation calculator estimates $100 in 1847 to be worth about $2,750 today. Using that formula, her relocation to America cost around $30,000. And this was certainly not for first class accommodations. She traveled below decks with all the other passengers, and cargo, and animals.

After all the trouble and expense of immigrating from Norway to Texas, the original settlement of Normandy did not live up to the settlers’ expectations. Illness and other factors precipitated a relocation in 1848 to nearby Four Mile Prairie/Prairieville. More settlers arrived in 1850, bringing the Norwegian contingent to 105. Still seeking better quality soil and water, many Norwegians pushed further west in 1854 when Bosque County was created. The communities of Clifton, Cranfills Gap, and Norse became the Norwegian stronghold in the state.

Norwegian settlements 1 - Normandy 2 - Four Mile/Prairieville 3 - Bosque County Note: map by Daniel Feher at freeworldmaps.net; red numbers added by me

 

The Bosque County location proved most successful for the Norwegian immigrants. Today it is home to Norse heritage resources such as the Bosque Museum and the Cleng Peerson Institute.

Statewide population of Norwegians in TexasCensus records of the time reflect a slow but steady influx of Norwegians.

1860 = 321

1870 = 552

1880 = 941

One estimate of the number of Texans of Norwegian descent today is around

My great-grandfather Ole Olson with his son Kenneth ca 1930

129,000.

Several Norwegian societies have chapters in Texas, including

Scandinavian Friends

Fun facts about Texas Norwegians, or 'Texwegians'

For more Texwegian fun, check out my book, The Dala Horse, now available on Amazon. 

Now available at Amazon

10-year-old Kaya Olson lives in a small Norwegian immigrant settlement in post-Civil War Texas. When her mother is killed, Kaya feels responsible. Can she uncover the secrets her family is keeping to solve the mystery surrounding her mother’s death?



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Then

33 Valentine's Days ago, we slipped over to the local Justice of the Peace on our lunch hour and got married. Then we went back to work. He was late because he stopped to buy me flowers. I wore white (try not to laugh). Actually it was a white suit with a pink blouse. We were the only couple there. Complete strangers served as our witnesses. You just can't get any more romantic than that.

We had both been through the big production wedding ceremony before. That was the last thing either of us wanted. Since we were paying for the second go-round ourselves, we chose to spend our money on a fun reception and honeymoon instead.

It actually was pretty cool because we kept it a secret from everyone. Afterward, I spent the rest of the afternoon trying to wipe the goofy grin off my face so people wouldn't think I had a three martini lunch (it was the 80s).

We finally told everyone, of course, but it was fun those few weeks prior to the event when only the two of us knew.

Now

When people find out our anniversary is Valentine's Day, they usually say they think it is a great idea, so romantic, etc. At least that's what they say to my face. I imagine they are secretly thinking what a crazy idea, and how problematic it would be to plan a wedding for that day. Yes, if you were going to go big with a fancy church/location, white dress, seven course reception and so forth. But if you are just going to the JP on your lunch hour, no biggie.

They also think it is a bad idea to combine the two events into a single day and possibly reduce gifting opportunities, like having a birthday on December 25. But my husband is no slacker. He always gets me separate gifts and cards (unlike me, he is a card guy), one for Valentine's and one for anniversary. It is problematic going out to celebrate as restaurants are mobbed. But they would be mobbed anyway, whether it was our anniversary or not, so we just plan around it.

Not sure how we are celebrating this year. It's hard to top the romance of running off to get married at the JP on your lunch hour.

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When the nice folks at the 10 Minute Novelists Facebook group reached out to me about publishing this guest post, I was happy to participate. I've found their group to be very friendly and helpful. Check out the post below and see if their writing convention coming up this summer fits into your schedule.

 

Click here for more info 

By Pam Humphrey

As writers, some days we struggle to find ten minutes in a day to dedicate to our writing. We scrape together small snippets of time each day, adding words to our work-in-progress. Those words add up. Our small things, brought together, can make something great.

The writers of the Facebook group 10 Minute Novelists believe that this is true. Started by Katharine Grubb, who wrote the book, Write A Novel in Ten Minutes A Day, the Facebook group offers tips, encouragement, and community for time-crunched writers worldwide.

August 9-11, 10 Minute Novelists will be hosting their first ever conference in Cincinnati, Ohio. The theme is fitting: Small Things Brought Together. The conference hopes to bring this online community of hard-working writers together for learning, support, and fun. Through the speakers and learning opportunities, they hope writers can make connections, amplify writing energy, and add tools to their writing toolbelt.

Their speakers include:

James Scott Bell, bestselling author of Plot & Structure, and award-winning thrillers like Final Witness, Romeo’s Rules, Don’t Leave Me, Blind Justice, Deceived, Try Dying, Watch Your Back, and One More Lie, will give the keynote.

Donald Maass, founder of the Donald Maass Literary Agency and author of The Career Novelist (1996), Writing the Breakout Novel (2001), Writing the Breakout Novel Workbook (2004), The Fire in Fiction (2009), The Breakout Novelist (2011) and Writing 21st Century Fiction (2012), will speak on The Fire In Fiction. This hands-on presentation will reveal how master contemporary novelists make every book great—and how participants can use the techniques of greatness in their current manuscripts.

Janice Hardy, founder and owner of FICTION UNIVERSITY, is the award-winning author of The Healing Wars trilogy, including The Shifter, Blue Fire, Darkfall from Balzer+Bray/Harper Collins, and of multiple books on writing, including the bestselling, Understanding Show, Don’t Tell (And Really Getting It). She’ll be speaking twice on Saturday: Planning Your Novel in Ten Easy Steps: 10 Surefire Steps to Planning a Bestseller! and (later that day) on Revision Readiness: How to Revise.

For more information go to http://www.10MinCon.com. The conference price is $329, but will go up to $379 after March 1, 2018. Price does not include travel, airfare, or hotel accommodation. Price does include lunch for Friday, August 10 and Saturday, August 11. Hotel accommodation information is also available at www.10MinCon.com.

Make time for your writing this summer. Join us at 10MinCon!

Pamela Humphrey, author of Finding Claire and Finding Kate, has been a member of 10 Minute Novelists since March 2016. She lives in San Antonio, Texas, with her husband, sons, black cats, and a leopard gecko.

Mystick Krewe of Comus invitations - notoriously hard to come by

Look at this beauty: an invitation to the Mystick Krewe of Comus' 1867 Mardi Gras ball.  Most are familiar with the springtime New Orleans extravaganza. But what's up with the krewe business?

First, let's clarify what's going on with the word 'krewe'. It's pronounced the same as 'crew', but the founders thought it would be fun to give a shout-out to John Milton and spell it old-style. Krewes are basically private clubs. Membership is select and usually requires a fee. Some membership rosters are secret. The fee varies widely, from a few bucks to thousands. Think country club membership, without the golf. Their purpose is to make a splashy contribution to the Mardi Gras celebration.  This usually takes the form of an elaborate parade float with all the accoutrements (costumes; items like fake coins and cheap beads to throw to the crowd). Some also throw a big party on Mardi Gras night, from lavish balls to tailgate-style cookouts.

The Comus Krewe is the oldest New Orleans krewe, founded in 1857.The founders were familiar with the long tradition of elaborate Mardi Gras celebrations in Mobile,

The theme for Comus Krewe's floats in 1867: Epicurean

Alabama, which began in 1703. Yes, that's right - Mobile is the birthplace of the Mardi Gras celebration as we know it, not New Orleans. Not to be outdone by their Gulf Coast neighbors to the east, the Comus Krewe put on quite the shindig at home in New Orleans that spring. It was a big hit. Word got around. In subsequent years, folks traveled from near and far to observe the annual New Orleans parade. And thus a multi-million dollar tourist industry was born.

Like some country clubs, membership in Comus was limited and pricey. It wasn't long before other krewes sprang up to fill the void created by their snootiness. Some were copycats, equally pricey and snooty. Some were more casual, catering to underserved (read: folks Comus wouldn't allow in their club, like non-whites, non-Protestants, non-men).

Flights of Fancy 1901 Mardi Gras parade float designed for Comus Krewe by Jenny Wilde, one of the first female float designers via Tulane University Library

Comus Krewe operations flowed more or less without interruption until they hit a bump in the parade route in 1992, when New Orleans passed an anti-discrimination law. Comus chose to withdraw from parade participation rather than comply with the new law as it applied to their membership. They still hold their annual ball.

Most of what you've read up to this point is more or less verified and accurate, as accurate as anything can be that is based on online research. This last bit is to be viewed with an exceedingly skeptical eye, but it was so outrageous and, dare I say, crazy, I had to share:

Diligent Googling about the Comus Krewe may also steer you to a website claiming to be a transcription of a deathbed confession by a former member. In it, he claims the krewe was a front for a secret society composed of anarchists, murderers, and (gasp!) Yankee bankers. The argument is made that certain founders of the Krewe had ties to powerful financial interests that supported the creation of the Confederacy, and therefore were behind all manner of mayhem to bring this to pass. It makes all kinds of claims connecting Comus Krewe to the Bank of Rothschild, the Illuminati, the Masons, the assassination and attempted assassination of various high ranking politicians, including James Buchanan, Zachary Taylor, William Henry Harrison (presidents all) and longtime Louisiana politician Huey P. Long. The confessor does say most krewe members were unaware of the diabolical deeds the ringleaders orchestrated.

The article is long, as conspiracy rants tend to be. It needs a good editor. It's probably a load of nonsense. But if you're a conspiracy theorist, or you're looking for some story ideas, check it out. The Comus Krewe confessions might lead you somewhere even more entertaining than the French Quarter during Mardi Gras.

This post originally appeared during my participation in the 2016 A to Z Blog Challenge. 

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All the hubbub about the Seth Rogen/James Franco comedy The Interview and its accompanying alleged North Korean threats against anyone showing/seeing the film, marketing strategy conspiracy theories, and censorship issues got me wondering if any other movies had caused a similar ruckus. After all, history tends to repeat itself. I challenge you to show me any recent headline that hasn't been seen or done before. And history proves me right in this instance, natch. Lots of movies have caused public uproars. Focusing on political films that directly target the leader of another country narrows the field considerably. Add debuting while said leader is still in power, and you get a very small sample size.

If you were ringing in on this topic on Jeopardy, you might answer, "What is The Great Dictator?", Charlie Chaplin's famous 1940 classic satirizing Adolf Hitler. However, another production caught my eye. I was delighted to learn there was an even earlier film by none other than the true kings of comedy: my childhood favorites, The Three Stooges. Their film, You Nazty Spy, beat Chaplin to theaters by several months. Moe Howard plays 'Moe Hailstone' aka Der Fuehrer, with Larry as 'Larry Pebbles' (Joseph Goebbels) and Curly as 'Curly Gallstone' (Hermann Goering). The 18-minute short film is full of Stooge silliness, physical humor, and so many puns, inside jokes and innuendo, I have to wonder how much of it the audience got on first viewing. After all, in 1940 there was no VCR, DVR,YouTube, or Wiki technology to ensure you got all the jokes.

Moe is the perfect Hitler (actually, with the addition of that little black smudge of mustache, any of us could pass). His stage persona as the bully of the threesome served him well as he ordered everyone around, shouted from podiums, and used that stiff arm salute to full advantage.

The plot thickens with the additional info that the three stars as well as the director, Jules White, were all of Jewish descent. It is tempting to cast these comedic icons as living dual lives as intrepid resistance leaders, but history does not quite bear this out. In 1940 it was common knowledge that the Nazi regime was anti-Semitic, but Jews were just one among many groups they targeted. It is doubtful either the Stooges or White were aware of the extent of the atrocities being committed or planned at the concentration camps. The idea for the short film may simply have been a combination of revenge fantasy, savvy co-opting of current events, and an irresistible desire to satirize such a ripe subject.

It is also tempting to envision You Nazty Spy as a heroic artistic statement that re-focused public opinion and precipitated the eventual fall of the Third Reich. Alas, again historical data points otherwise. Before the Pearl Harbor attack in 1941, many Americans felt strongly about staying out of the European conflict. The faltering economy during the Great Depression, plus lingering memories of the atrocities of World War I had few in a mood to get involved in another foreign dispute. I tried to find out how the film was received; no luck. As a short film, it likely would have been bundled with other media such as a full length feature, a news reel, etc., thus making it difficult to determine how it fared individually.

The film was lucky even to have been made. Prior to our current movie ratings system, there existed a movie censorship system known informally as the Hays Code. The Hays Code was developed as a sort of moral compass for a movie industry that many felt had gone off the rails in the early part of the 20th century.  The code listed many topics and behaviors to be avoided. Movie producers/directors submitted their screenplays to the censor. Movies that passed muster got made. Movies that didn't, didn't. You Nazty Spy violated the Hays Code as it related to causing 'willful offense' of foreign nations, but likely squeaked through because it was a short film - full length feature films were the focus of the censor's scrutiny.

Messrs. Rogen and Franco have some large shoes to fill, three pairs' worth between the two of them. They're funny, but Three Stooges-level funny? Only time will tell. I don't know if the writers were aware of You Nazty Spy as they wrote The Interview. There are some interesting parallels to be drawn between the two films, never mind the 70+-year gap in production timeline:

Satire Sells

The Three Stooges were busy fellows. They were under contract to shoot several short films annually. With such a long career, it probably wasn't long before the idea well began to run dry. Then, as now, current events to the rescue! And what better way to bring attention to a grim, humorless topic sore in need of public awareness than education masquerading as comedy? If you don't believe this, compare the box office earnings of most wretched, juvenile, bathroom humor bomb to the highest of highbrow documentaries. Not. Even. Close.*

Beware the Bomb

The international hubbub over The Interview (whether real, or, according to the conspiracy theorists, a marketer's wet dream) made the term 'box office bomb' fearfully literal. Anonymous bomb threats to any theaters showing the film probably had many re-thinking their holiday viewing plans. The Stooges had their own bomb scare, but not over their Hitler film. Earlier in their career, they had a less than amicable split with fellow performer Ted Healy. Healy threatened to bomb theaters where Three Stooges performed if they pursued a career without him. Thankfully, both threats were empty (so far).

The End - Spoiler Alert

If you finish your dinner, you get to wear your dinner's hat

Both films chose to off their protagonists. I haven't seen The Interview, but I understand Kim Jong-un loses his head in a rather violent fashion. In You Nazty Spy, Hitler and his cronies don't make it out alive, either, although their demise is not shown on screen - only suggested by a roar and a belch. The Stooges going for subtlety - imagine that!

I haven't seen The Interview. I was all for seeing it for solidarity, but the more this story unfolds, the more I wonder if this hasn't all been a huge publicity stunt. I think I'll wait it out. I've got 219 more Stooges films to catch up on.

*For example, 2014 figures for #78 out of 100, the comedy Sex Tape earned $38.5 million domestic. Top grossing documentary 2014, something called America which hardly seems to fit my 'highest of the highbrow' requirement, but whatever: $14 million. Citizen Four (about Edward Snowden) is perhaps a better match, raking in a (relatively) paltry $2 million. Figures from BoxOfficeMojo.com.

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2

One of Google's MLK Day doodles

Recently we celebrated MLK Day, a national holiday honoring slain civil rights leader Martin Luther King, Jr. National government agencies got a paid vacay. Where I live, schools were closed.  I quantify that because state and local entities don't necessarily have to follow along with national holidays. Most do, but there is some wiggle room there. The local entities have to budget for paying the employees for that day off, so they have some say in it.

Side note: originally there was some resistance to the MLK holiday from a few sectors, most notably Arizona. By refusing to support the national holiday passed in 1986, they lost hundreds of millions of dollars in federal funding, and Super Bowl XXVII (27 for those of you non-nerds who didn't take Latin in high school) moved to Pasadena in protest. Ouch!

We are fairly well covered with national holidays as follows:

January - New Year's Day 1/1, Martin Luther King Jr. Day 3rd Monday

February - President's Day 3rd Monday

March

April

May - Memorial Day last Monday

June

July - Independence Day July 4

August

September - Labor Day 1st Monday

October - Columbus Day 2nd Monday

November - Veterans Day 11/11, Thanksgiving 4th Thursday

December - Christmas 12/25

Look at those four gaps just begging for more celebrating. This puts me in mind of all the oddball holidays. Not a single day of the year is without one. Now we could go for the low-hanging fruit to plug those gaps and add the obvious (St. Patrick's Day, April Fools, Father's Day, etc.) But where's the fun in that? If I could wave a magic legislative wand and add one more national holiday, here's my short list. It was very difficult for me not to make every choice food-related, but I did my best.

March - Must be tough competition with Easter sometimes falling within March. I mean - Plumbing Day (11)? Buzzards Day (15)? Thank goodness for Crayola Crayon Day (31).

April - is my new favorite month. It has Beer Day (7), Pillow Fight Day (5), and Grill Cheese Day (12).

June - June is struggling, with Eat Your Vegetables Day (17), Blood Donor Day (14), Sewing Machine Day (13), and Insurance Awareness Day (28) zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. However, it is redeemed by two capital holidays: Flip Flop Day (20) and Sauntering Day (19). Let's make EVERY day 'Sauntering Day'!

August - Wow, and I thought June was struggling. Love Litigating Lawyers Day (31)? Really? I'm gonna hafta go ahead and choose either International Lefthanders Day (13) or Creamsicle Day (14) with Fresh Breath Day (6) a very tempting option also. Here's my dad's contribution to Fresh Breath Day: ask your friend if they have a breath mint. If they say 'no', you say, 'here, have one of mine'.

If you didn't see anything you liked in the above suggestions, how about coming up with a holiday or two on your own? It is quite a process to get a day declared a national holiday. All that pesky politicking and budget wrangling pressure spoils the fun. But it appears if you don't care about the national bit, all you have to do to declare a day a holiday is to declare it. I am declaring today Finish Your Blog Post Day. Tomorrow is going to be Take A Break From Blogging Every Day Day.

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